My First Blog by Sophia

NOTE: due to sensitivity of the matter, i decided not to narrate what really was the problem which would probably make this writing a little bit "out of this planet ". i do hope, with the wisdom of our ALMIGHTY GOD, you will be able to get something from this. 


ITS me vs Monster PAGUFE

For the past week, i scarcely slept and ate well. Unusual rashes covered some parts of my back, lower neck, and stomach. (It was so annoying that i even reprimand myself from eating chicken thinking its an allergic reaction.) Instantaneously, i became choleric, squeamish, moody, and a total jerk.

Perhaps, PAGUFE was succeeding in his job-that is gnawing my heart, suffocating my mind, abasing my soul.
Who is he?
He is a monster.
And i created him.......WITHIN.
He came to life when something happened between me and 2 of my dear friends.
He was benign at the beginning thus, i ignored him. I pretended i was fine, i faked my smiles, i even disdained the mere thought of asking for help. Then, he slowly grew bigger...so sooner than i thought..

I tried to confront PAGUFE. 
I tried to destroy this heinous monster.
But, before every battle would start, i would cowardly surrender.
Call me chicken, timid, craven, dastard, poltroon. Call me whatever you want. For me, its just hard to combat against the soldier you see when you look in the mirror. It is so hard 
to face ones fault,
to accept ones shortcomings,
and to forgive ones wrongdoing.

PAGUFE is my PAin, my GUilt, my FEar. He is crashing my spirit everyday until i remembered HIM.

>PSALM 27:1"The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?"
>PSALM 46:1-3 "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.Therefore will not we fear , though the earth be removed , and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea;Though the waters thereof roar and be troubled , though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof. Selah."
>ISAIAH 60:13a "As one whom his mother comforteth , so will I comfort you.."
>ISAIAH 41:10 " Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed ; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness."

i lost many battles against PAGUFE, but i,with willingness, and GOD won the war. Nothing is bigger than Him; not the monster we create or Satan himself..."for our God is a consuming fire." Heb. 12:29

Now, those cataclysmal moments are nothing but learnings. I am walking in the road which God purposely prepared for me. Their will be many self-created monster i will face in the future...yet, for now, THE WAR is OVER.




Taken from the message Janine sent to me since she can't access blogger yet and we don't know why. All of the content was written by Janine. I just posted it.

We'll See Each Other Again!

Yehey! Tomorrow is the day we've been waiting and dreading for. I'm so happy that I can see again my Blessed Singleness sisters. And, I can get to spend time with them. Maybe you're wondering why I'm the one writing here again. The others were busy or they were away [sort of]. Anyway, please expect that they'll be writing here soon. I'won't stop bugging them until they do it. hehehehehe.

Anyway, I just want to inform our readers that we will be reunited once again. I won't be here much, though, because I created my own blog now so I'll only write here once in a while if there are any news about the BS. Don't be sad [as if anyone will be sad].. hehehehe.. God speed to my brothers and sisters in Christ Jesus!

Jessreal and I are looking forward to our future Bible studies since we were able to buy a handbook at a bargain book shop 2 weeks ago. We hope that the others will like it as well. I can say that all of us grew more mature during the summer break.

The Start of a New School Year

Yes, so it's only a few weeks time before classes will resume. I'm anxious and glad at the same time. Anxious because I don't know who my professors will be and IF they are going to be terrors or not. Glad because I will get to spend a lot of time with my friends, though, not with my BS sisters since we have different schedules. I do hope that we can find available times to do some Bible study for this semester. I'm the only one who has a very different schedule from them so I guess I'll be missing many things. I do hope my insecurities will disappear. On the other hand, it's not like I can't see them anymore right? I do miss them a lot but we don't have that much choice. I know that they will be always there for me as I am for them.
I've heard some senpais say that junior year is the hardest for the English majors since projects are thrown at us left & right. I'm sure that is true since I've seen them work so hard. However, I believe that the senior year would be the hardest for me since I'm not cut out to be a teacher let alone in English. Thinking about that, I can only rely on God for the strength to endure and overcome. He knows my strengths and my weaknesses, my insecurities and my fears, so I'm sure He will work everything out for His glory. I just have to trust in Him and let Him do what He wants to do in my life. I know college is not easy but there is nothing impossible with the Lord. Faith can move mountains just as Jesus Christ said.

Talking about summer vacation..............


How was your summer vacation? Mine was uneventful except for my driving lessons and some minor conflicts. I can now drive but I haven't processed my license yet. I'm not in a hurry anyway. I also had a Bible study session with my brothers and sisters in Zarkity. I have participated in the recent presidential election in my country in order to exercise my right to suffrage. My bet didn't win but I'm content since I voted for someone whom I believe can lead the country well. Plus, I know that the Lord has a grand plan for my country and it was by His decree that the winners won the election. All I need to do is pray for the leaders of this nation and to support their advocacies as long as they are in accord with the Word of God.
This summer, I learned many things and the most recent was Esau and David's similar skin color. It may be just a small thing to learn but I never knew this before and I believe that every learning with regards to the Bible is worth noting. This is something that I haven't learned in Sunday schools or in Bible studies or in conferences that I have attended. Another thing I learned was about the Seventh Day Adventists and their doctrines. I won't say it here since it's controversial and I don't want to offend adventists. Still, what I learned about them is also of grave importance.

I guess that's all I can write this time. My summer this year is better than the last one since I did many things and I reconnected with old contacts/chatmates. I hope and pray that God will bless everyone who reads this post and may your faith grow stronger together with us in the Blessed Singleness.

*Note: I'll try and encourage my sisters in the BS to write their eventful summer vacation one of these days. Please look forward to it!